Alexander Stewart If You Only Knew Lyrics

I've been trying so hard to survive
Sometimes I think that I wanna die
I feel so f_cking guilty cuz god I'm so lucky
To live my life
So I keep all the pain to myself
Losing faith but nobody can tell
Mom, I don't want you worried cuz that would just hurt me
So I pretend I'm fine

If you only knew
What my mind is telling me I should do
That I'm drunk and all alone in my room here tonight
I'm too sad to cry, it's true
If you only knew
All the sh_t my brain is putting me through
You'd come running over straight to my room here tonight
I'm sorry but I need you
If you only knew

I wish I was somebody else
I'm constantly overwhelmed
Now I'm falling again getting drunk with some friends
It's a silent cry for help

I wanna get better, I want you to know
That I can't do this on my own

If you only knew
What my mind is telling me I should do
That I'm drunk and all alone in my room here tonight
I'm too sad to cry, it's true
If you only knew
All the sh_t my brain is putting me through
You'd come running over straight to my room here tonight
I'm sorry but I need you

Take me out of this hell
Oh, somebody help
Take me out of this hell
Oh, I'm not myself

I wanna tell you
What my mind is telling me I should do
That I'm drunk and all alone in my room here tonight
I'm too sad to cry but I want to
Oh, if you only knew