Brian Hull Friend Like Me Parody Lyrics

Well, Ali Baba had them forty thieves.
Sherazadie had a thousand tails,
But, master, you're in luck 'cause up your sleeves,
You've got a brand of magic never fails.
You've got some power in your corner now;
Some heavy ammunition in your camp.
You've got some punch, pizzaz, yahoo, and how.
See all you've gotta do is rub that lamp,
And I'll say...

Mr. Aladdin, sir, what will your pleasure be?
Let me take your order, jot it down, you ain't never had a friend like me.
Life is your restaurant,
And I'm your maitre di.
Come whisper what it is you want.
You ain't never had a friend like me.

Yes, sir, we pride ourselves on service.
You're the boss, the king, the shah!
Say what you wish.
It's yours, true dish.
How 'bout a little more balclava?

Have some of Column A. Try all of Column B.
I'm in the mood,
To help you, dude!
You ain't never had a friend like me.

*chicken noises*

Can your friends say this? (Oh boy!)
Can your friends say that? (Oh, gosh!)
Can your friends say this (Ah, phooey!) just like Donald Duck?
Can your friends go-- *gibberish* (Ah, phooey!)?

Can your friends go abracadabra, let 'er rip, then make the sucker disappear?
Don't just sit there slack-jawed, buggy-eyed, I'm here to answer all your midday prayers!

You got me bone fide, certified!
You got a genie for your chargé d'affaires.

I've got a powerful urge to help you out,
So what's your wish? I really wanna know!
You got a list that's three miles long, no doubt.
All you gotta do is rub like so, and ho!

Mr. Aladdin, sir, have a wish or two or three.
I'm on the job,
You big nabob.
You ain't never had a friend,
Never had a friend,
You ain't never had a friend,
Never had a friend,
You ain't never... had a... friend... like... me!

Wah wah wah!
Wah wah wah!
You ain't never had a friend like me!